One of the reasons I started Gen X Watch was to be the antithesis to the flood of memes on my social feeds. The ones posted by fellow Gen Xers bragging that we had the best childhood.
You know the ones: pictures of kids from the 80s on BMX bikes, in muscle cars, hanging out, or listening to mixtapes. Sometimes they are side-by-side with today’s teens glued to smartphones. The caption smugly reads something like, “We were cooler back in the day.” They seem harmless to many of my peers, but these memes make me cringe. They carry an ugly subtext: that our generation is superior to the younger ones. And that notion is not only hurtful to our children and grandchildren, but it’s also bullshit.
Every time I see this kind of content, a small piece of me aches. Not just for us, but for the generations we claim to love.
It’s time to talk about it.
Gen X Was Beautiful But We Weren’t Better
I love my generation. We were the latchkey kids that made us self learners with killer survival skills. We made mixtapes that changed history. Yeah, we rode our bikes until the streetlights came on. We endured things like loneliness, trauma, and systemic neglect that formed a gritty resilience.
But that doesn’t make us better. It makes us survivors of a different era. And it is my hope that we are not one of the things future generations have to survive in their era.
Let’s be really honest about something. If we were young today, we wouldn’t be in muscle cars with Def Leppard blasting through the speakers. We’d be vibing to Billie Eilish and Chapel Roan, gaming online, talking about our anxiety and dancing on TikTok and all the other things we shame them for being into.
If you think you would be different, you’re wrong. Young people are shaped by the world they live in just like we were. We were not born inherently cooler, tougher, or wiser. We adapted to our world. So are they.
I’m about bring some receipts to this rant.
Nostalgia vs. Reality: Were We Really “Cooler”?
Every generation is convinced their youth was the golden age. This shitty superiority complex isn’t new. Older folks have literally been grumbling about “kids these days” since ancient times. Since you may not click the hyperlink, let me break it down.
Historians show the complaints about “the frivolous youth” could just as easily have come from a 1920s grandparent as from a Greek poet in 700 B.C. In other words, thinking we were the coolest gen is a classic delusion shared by every generation.
The truth is, we were simply products of our time. Different decades offer different toys and tunes. Being young and loving and finding beauty in what’s popular (or counter cultural) in your youth that you discover in the midst of the shitshow called adolescence is a universal experience.
Psychologists observe the obvious that meme shame sharers are too lame to see. Young adults have always grown up in a world different from their parents’ world. It’s also totally normal for older generations to feel alarmed by the new stuff their kids are into.
Remember when our parents and grandparents shook their heads at our MTV videos or the way we dressed or did our hair? Now it’s our turn to see trends that we don’t quite get. Older generations (that’s us… sorrynotsorry) often have difficulty adapting to new environments, while those born into it find it natural.
In short, we’re not inherently cooler and they are not into stupid shit. We just have different cultural playgrounds. Our nostalgia is valid and beautiful and healing, but it doesn’t make us superior.
The Harm in Playing “Who’s Better”
What really scares me is how these “we were better” messages land on the younger generation. When we act like gatekeepers of coolness, our kids and grandkids hear something very different. They hear, “Your world is lame. Ours was better. You’ll never measure up. You are too much and not enough.” That message carries harmful, and sometimes deadly, consequences. Yeah, claiming our superiority isn’t just untrue.. it’s hurtful. Peer reviewed studies (as opposed to the fucker making toxic memes) show that young people feel genuine distress when they’re slapped with negative stereotypes by their elders.
Think about it: as teens, we hated being called the things Boomers and the Silent Generation called us. The library confessions scene in the Breakfast Club highlights the real hurt it caused. We were on the receiving end of plenty of harsh generational labels and it fucked some of us up. It made us feel misunderstood and disrespected. Why would we want to inflict that same sting on the next generations and make Bender a prophet?
When Gen X memes mock (directly or backhandedly) Gen Z and Gen Alpha for “not being as cool or tough or whateverthefuck,” it creates shame and resentment the same way it always has throughout history. This is part of generational trauma and it perpetuates the dangerous cycle where we are party to breeding guilt and anger in the younger gen creating a lasting rift.
We end up driving a wedge between ourselves and them. Nobody likes to feel constantly measured against some nostalgic ideal they had no part in. It’s deeply demoralizing to be told your formative years are inferior to someone else’s glory days while your dealing with all the other shit going on in this world.
Beyond generational trauma, there’s a real risk that our superiority complex can make us bad listeners and poor mentors. If we’re busy scoffing them smugly we might miss out on what they kids can teach us. Even worse, we will be absent when they might need our understanding.
We have a choice. We can be the gatekeepers who guard the past or supportive guides who embrace the future. And as a parent, that’s not who I want to be. I want my young adult to feel proud of their era and also know that I’m proud of them.
My nickname among my child’s peers is Fatherman. Know why I get this amazing nickname? I’m there when other parents with their mommy wino and daddy beer memes are not. I pick up the pieces, hold space, and love them through the pain as best I can. I know the void and I know what it is to be blamed for someone else’s addiction and absence. And I also know what it is to not measure up to my dad’s glory days and the insignificant feelings of not measuring up.
Gen Z and Gen Alpha: A New Kind of Cool
Here’s the beautiful irony: while we’re busy flexing about how tough or cool we were, today’s young people are achieving things we never did. Our memes paint them as soft or uncool, but reality tells a very different story. In many respects, Gen Z and Gen Alpha are more aware and progressive than we were at their age.
They’re growing up far more open-minded about personal identity and inclusion. A Pew Research report found that the younger generation is the most likely to support gender diversity.. nearly 60% of Gen Z say forms should include options beyond “male” and “female,” compared to far fewer Gen Xers who feel the same.
They’re also generally more inclusive racially and ethnically and do not suffer from our ableist mindset leaving our peers with disabilities in the dust of society.
Let’s talk about emotional intelligence and mental health. This is an area where younger generations truly shine!
We grew up in a time when saying “I’m depressed” might earn you a “suck it up” speech.
Many of us in Gen X learned to swallow our feelings and “be tough,” which often meant not dealing with our mental health at all. But today?
Gen Z and Gen Alpha are breaking that pattern. They’re far more open about discussing mental health, seeking help, and supporting each other through struggles. In fact, nearly 9 in 10 Gen Z folks feel comfortable talking about their mental health with others!
They openly share feelings, go to therapy, and start support groups online. This emotional awareness isn’t a weakness; it’s a strength. It means our kids and grandkids are better equipped to seek help when needed and to extend compassion and empathy (still not a sin) to others.
The younger generation’s social conscience is strong, too. They’ve spearheaded movements for climate action and social justice with a passion and savvy that often leaves me in awe. They are digital natives who mobilize awareness for causes overnight on social media. They call out toxic behaviors and strive to create inclusive communities.
Are they perfect? Of course not ! They’re still figuring life out! But so are we. The point is, their “cool” just looks different from ours, and that’s okay. They have their own music, their own slang, their own heroes and pop culture. They also have their own challenges to overcome. Dismissing all that not only sells them short, but it robs us of the joy of discovering what’s awesome about their era.
We Have So Much To Share If We Choose Love
Imagine what could happen if we dropped the smug memes and embraced connection.
Imagine telling your grandkid or a young friend:
“You know what? Your world is different than mine was. And it’s beautiful. Show me your favorite artist. Let’s watch your favorite show together.”
Imagine building bridges instead of walls.
Cassettes are cool again. What if we shared the poetry of a mixtape as a craft for the day out of their favorite spotify playlist?
Instead of them hearing us say they do not measure up, they get to hear, “I see you, I know you, I love you!”
When they are going through hell we can share how we got through it, Many of our distractions and discoveries make for great coping skills.
Instead of shaming the world they live in, we could celebrate what’s timeless! Creativity, passion, connection, rebellion, and resilience!
Cool Without Cruelty
Here’s where I stand and never will never apologize for:
- I will call out toxic memes that shame or harm younger generations.
- I will remember that resilience looks different today and that’s a good thing.
- I will celebrate both the beauty of my generation and the beauty of theirs.
- I will build bridges, not burn them.
We have an incredible legacy! One of survival, innovation, creativity, and fierce independence. But our best legacy can be something even greater: love without superiority that breaks thousands of years of generational trauma.
Let’s show the next generations what real punk rebellion looks like:
Kindness. Inclusion. Lifting them higher than we were ever lifted.
That’s the kind of legacy worth making memes about.
How Hearts of Glass Living in the Real World Builds Bridges, Not Walls
When I wrote Hearts of Glass Living in the Real World, it wasn’t just a love letter to the 1980s. It was, and still is, a love letter to every young person trying to find their way, no matter the decade they were born into.
The characters-Ford, Cassie, Jenny- wrestle with timeless questions:
Who am I really? Where do I belong? Can I be loved for who I am?
These aren’t Gen X questions, or Gen Z questions.
They are human questions.
Through their struggles and triumphs, Hearts of Glass Living in the Real World celebrates what’s universal:
- The bravery of being vulnerable.
- The beauty of unexpected friendships.
- The strength it takes to break cycles of trauma and shame.
It doesn’t scold today’s youth for being different! It honors the courage it takes to be young, period.
It says: “You are not alone. Your story matters. Your heart matters.”
That’s what building bridges looks like.
That’s what celebrating all generations looks like.
If we let go of hubris, we can share our stories as invitations to connection, resilience, and hope.
Hearts of Glass Living in the Real World isn’t just about remembering who we were.
It’s about helping every young person -past, present, and future -know they are seen, valued, and loved.
You can get it on Bookshop. If you prefer an ebook, simply go to Lulu!
Stay totally awesome!
Stay true to you!
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